Goat Simulator, You Got To Be Kidding!

I guess the original impetus for Goat Simulator was to compete with the Internet’s love of dogs and cats. I’m certainly a dedicated advocate of dogs with the release of my new online initiative known as ‘Canines Reimagined’ — but so much for my obvious self-promotion — "goats' seem to be the latest Internet craze sweeping the zeitgeist.

Great game apps share a number of common components. They need to offer cutting-edge graphics, captivating narratives, sound tracks that trigger and heighten suspense and game mechanics. But above all else the quality of the game has to be such that makes it memorable. It has to have legs for you to not only play them ad infinitum, but also to convert gamers into game advocates who help spread the word, extending the app makers salesforce exponentially.

Does Goat Simulator fit the bill?

When Goat Simulator was launched on March 31, 2014, it was hard not to think it was an April Fool’s joke. Particularly with a price tag of $9.99, gamers were initially hard pressed to take this game seriously.

This perception was reinforced by the developers, themselves. Coffee Stain Studios described the offbeat nature of the game as “an old school skating game, except instead of being a skater, you're a goat, and instead of doing tricks, you wreck stuff. It brings next-gen goat simulation to YOU.” The developer also cautioned that the game had “MILLIONS OF BUGS!”


Goat Simulator extended their tongue-and-cheek branding approach, with this disclaimer:

“Goat Simulator is a small, broken and stupid game. It was made in a couple of weeks so don’t expect a game in the size and scope of GTA [Grand Theft Auto] with goats. In fact, you’re better off not expecting anything at all actually. To be completely honest, it would be best if you’d spend your $10 on a hula hoop, a pile of bricks, or maybe a real-life goat.”

The promo video gives you some additional insight as to how goats are used and abused to spread chaos throughout the land.

Quit Goat Bashing

With its limited number of bells and whistle, this game in waning in popularity, now that it’s three years old. While the Internet has had a thing with goats, there a lot of good that goats do in the real world. In my recent post, “Kids Replacing The Job of Men [and Women]’ I covered the benefits of using goats to mow commercial lawns. Google even launched an initiative, which received widespread national publicity when they took a low-carbon approach to mowing fields at their Mountain View headquarters’ in the Silicon Valley. Instead of using noisy lawn mowers that run on gasoline and pollute our air, they rented goats from California Grazing to do the job.

Think of it this way: As much as the love we have dogs and cats, the world is also enamored when watching goats online and in real life. So, it's my opinion, we need to portray these animals in a brighter light than the dark, dismal realm of Goat Simulator.

Don’t be a Silly Billy

Why invest a ten-spot to play a game that’s not more than a five-minute time-filler — that even the developers have warn you about.

No kidding folks. In case you didn’t know it, goats are known to engage in cross-species sociability on a regular basis. Goats were the first species humans domesticated. About 10,000 years ago, they got a head-start over all those dogs and cats you've been housing over the years.

Goats should be our 'new' best friends, don't you think?

Primary Source: Goat Simulator