Bad Kitties: The Top 10 'Beware Of Cat” Signs
Dogs have dominated the warning sign universe for far too long; now it's time for cats to get due respect. These 10 “Beware of Cat” signs spell out what experienced cat-owners, shell-shocked door-to-door salesmen and well-meaning macho mutts know all too well: mess with the cat, you get the claws!
10) Crouching Tiger
“Kung Fu Cat” may sound like something you might find on a dodgy Chinese restaurant's menu but be assured: this is no skittish kitty! Wouldn't it be cool if ALL cats knew Kung Fu? Those old karate flicks wouldn't have needed any dubbed-in sound effects. (Beware of Cat sign image via Your Gingerbread House)
9) Beware Of Cat, He's A Mean Drunk
The trademark goofy expression, the bloodshot eyes, the overall disheveled appearance... this cat's had two too many Catnip Cocktails. Should one really be wary of the pickled purrer? Oh yeah... if he breathes on you, you're a goner. (Beware of Cat sign image via Life With The D's)
8) Fat Cat In Cahoots
Maybe it's just me, but doesn't advertising the fact that your supposed “Guard Cat” is morbidly obese sort of defeat the purpose of having a Guard Cat to begin with? What's more, the cat probably won't appreciate having his rounded physique displayed on a sign (would you?) and just might be tempted to team up with the cat burglars out of spite. (Beware of Cat sign image via My Security Sign)
7) House Of Hellcats
So, this is Richard Lewis's house then? If not, the self-proclaimed originator of the “From Hell” buzz-phrase is gonna be really annoyed - he may just sic his cat on whomever designed this sign. By the way, can you “sic” a cat on someone? (Beware of Cat sign image via The Perfect Sign)
6) Dirty Hairy Cat Lady Lives Here
I know what you're thinking. “Does she have six cats or only five?” Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Manx, the most powerful housecat in the world, and would gnaw your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk? (Beware of Cat sign image via Mad About Cats)
5) Scary Silhouette Cat Is Scary
No smiling face, no big bright eyes, just the black silhouette of a cat in full arched-back aggressive mode. Remember the creepy hissing cat from American Werewolf in London? If cats can frighten werewolves, consider your home to be well-protected. (Beware of Cat sign image via Art Fire)
4) Attenti Al Gatto
Here's a “Beware of Cat” sign in Italian... or perhaps, a warning to pay attention to Al Gatto or else you might find yourself sleeping with the catfishes tonight. Is it worth finding out which one it is? No, compadre, it is not. Don't knock, don't leave any literature, just quickly & quietly leave - and count yourself lucky Signore Gatto didn't make you an offer you couldn't refuse. (Beware of Cat sign image via Cat Pause)
3) Krazy Kat
We haven't even been able to figure out what everyday, ordinary, rational cats are about so the possibility of encountering an irrational cat... well, it's just too ominous to even consider. (Beware of Cat sign image via Sign Cast)
2) Gang Signs & Felines
I see your pack of dogs and I raise you a Band of Cats! These tough cat-stomers put the “OW” in MEOW, and if you're thinking of infringing on their turf prepare to feel the wrath of Big Pussy, Inna-City Kitty, Calico Capone and The Claw. (Beware of Cat sign images via Band of Cats and Animales Locos)
1) Please Beware... Or Else!
They're asking you to “please” beware of the cat, isn't that enough? No? Perhaps a graphic description of the consequences is required... and believe you me, there's no room for politeness once feline fury has been aroused. Better to just let sleeping dogs, er, cats lie... ain't it the truth? (Beware of Cat sign image via Cujogirl)
Mock the concept of “Beware of Cat” signs if you like, but be aware that cats can be fiercely territorial creatures who are naturally equipped to defend what's theirs. Ever wonder where the expression “cat got your tongue” came from? Obey the signs and you'll never need to know. (Beware of Cat sign images via Telegraph Media Group Ltd. (top) and House Panthers)
If you are looking for your own beware of cat sign, Amazon has a collection of funny ones here.