Puns Proliferate For Puppy Bowl

Each year in advance of the Super Bowl, there’s another ‘Bowl’ that catches the imagination of thousands of fans. Now, into its 8th year on Animal Planet, the Puppy Bowl has become ‘ruff-er and ruff-er’ to come up with funny quips to describe this momentous event. As the bard, once said: “brevity is the soul of wit,” so if you’re going to be wittier than the next guy, you have to be able to “punt” some succinct one liners that can ‘bowl’ us all over . . . don't you think?

“The hardest part is coming up with interesting and creative puns that haven’t been said before because there’s only so much you can do with pause interference and roughing the piss and foul on the 20-yard line,” said Dan Schachner, who has been the referee for the annual event over last 6 years . . . a televised show that coincides with the Super Bowl.

“You have to come up with interesting new ways to say the same thing. They’re puppies. They pee. They poop. They sleep. They play. They jump on each other. Occasionally, they score a touchdown,” he explained.

“You have to find interesting ways to say all of those. I literally have a sheet of puns that I’ve used and puns that I haven’t used. I’m just waiting to use the ones that I haven’t used and hopefully people will appreciate them. We discovered a new one today, which is instead of saying when there’s poop on the field ‘third down,’ ‘turd down.’ I thought that was good. Or you know in football, they say third and long. Turd and long. That’s my new one,” he said.

Each year, social media is a twitter when comedians and would-be funnymen try to outdo each other on Twitter and Facebook. So who's the 'leader of the pack?' Here are a few that have been floating around in the lead-up to this canine free-for-all:

  • Adam Wolf: “I always thought the Puppy Bowl was a menu item at a Korean fast food restaurant.”
  • Lee Mays: “The Puppy Bowl has been marred with accusations of a beagle using performance enhancing doggy treats.”
  • Cooper Talk: “Sweet! Won my parlay card on the #PuppyBowl. Ruff beat Fluff, covered the spread and I nailed the over/under. Cha ching!”
  • Erik Bransteen: “The Kitten Bowl will now air against the #PuppyBowl. I don't have cable, so Ill be staring at the much less interesting Dead Goldfish Bowl.”
  • Ben Rosenfeld: “#AbsurdSuperBowlPredictions The Puppy Bowl becomes a type of dip.”
  • David Speier: “I think the team that gets over the hump first will win #PuppyBowl.”
  • Ralph Giordano: “Looking forward to seeing Pup Daddy do the halftime show. #PuppyBowl.”
  • Wag: “BREAKING: Puppy Bowl quarterback arrested in illegal interstate human fighting ring scandal.”


Interesting to note, that every pun-able pooch that participates in “Puppy Bowl XIII” —  where these dogs are pitted against each other — comes from an animal shelter and is available for adoption.

Dubbed the “cutest game of the year,” the “Puppy Bowl” airs Sunday, Feb. 5, at 3 p.m. ET on Animal Planet.